Love your decisions
I had this super stressful dream a couple nights ago and I’m still thinking about it. In my dream I was pregnant with my third child and I couldn’t decide on a name for my baby. The worst part, everyone kept throwing out their opinions.
It went like this:
Person 1: It has to be another M name.
Me: Well, does it really?
Person 2: Yes!
Me: But, I didn’t really want to start the whole M name thing anyway, it just sorta happened.
Person 3: It doesn’t matter, you started it and it’s not fair to your third child to NOT have an M name.
Me: But I really can’t find another M name I like.
And then I remember looking and looking through the baby name book. I was flipping the pages frantically and no matter how hard I looked, I hated them all.
I woke up sweating. My heart was racing. Why in the hell was this such a big deal? I’m not pregnant. And it’s just a name for crying out loud!
Then it hit me. This dream wasn’t about naming a baby, because really, I may not have another baby. Or, I may have three more babies. Who knows?! And, if I did have three more babies then I could just pick another letter and be done with it.
This dream was about me and how I constantly let other people’s opinions effect my decisions. If I decide I’m going to do something, but then someone tells me not to do it, I probably won’t do it. I have a hard time deciding which one I should do. Who should I listen to? Who is right? Who is wrong?
In the long run it doesn’t matter. Or, wait, it does matter. I need to make these decisions for myself and be happy with the choice I’ve made. I need to not let anyone, with a seemingly bigger opinion, sway my choice. “The more you love your decisions, the less you need others to love them.”
And, if you were wondering, I found two perfectly good M names for my third child: Maverick or Mountain Lion. Aw, look, it’s little baby Mountain Lion. I love her.